From Jenns Pen

Lookie Here!

2010-03-16T10:50:00.000-04:00

This e-mail was waiting for me this morning, regarding my son Nicholas. I'm so excited.

This makes me feel much better about having him on medication.

Mrs. S,

I just wanted to let you know that Nick just had his Chapter 6 test, and
he was the highest scorer out of all of my algebra classes (He actually
ended with more extra credit points correct than points he missed). His
attitude and attentiveness have really improved, and his algebra grades
are definitely reflecting it!

Thanks, and have a great day,
Ms. H

Mom...You gotta come home NOW!

2010-03-15T16:27:00.000-04:00

Holy Hell...those are words you DO NOT wanna hear from your 13 year old over the cell phone.

....luckily it wasn't a major crisis like I had first invisioned...but, it surely wasn't what I wanted to come home to on a Friday evening after work!

Something happened to my washing machine (God knows what) but...when I started a load this morning and left for work...the water NEVER quit running......ALL DAY!

There was about 2 inches of water in my laundry room, computer room, and living room :(

Of course...this wouldn't have happened if hubby was here, it ALWAYS happens during his stints away...URGH!

Anyone wanna come over and save me?! :)

Water, water, everywhere!

2010-03-15T16:24:00.003-04:00

This was taken in my mom's front yard. There is usually JUST a ditch that runs close to the road, and you wouldn't normally even SEE it in this pic.
Nick decided to go swimming in the yard....and we joined him right after this shot. :)
He was standing in this pic, that is how deep the water was.

This is our skatepark downtown, it was COMPLETELY under water. Normally there is a small river that runs behind all the trees in this pic. Can you say flood :)

Diabetes?

2010-03-15T16:21:00.002-04:00

It all started over a year ago...after my dad's accident, and subsequent diabetes. We were discussing the effects of insulin and blood sugar. I decided to give everyone a lesson...and check their blood sugar after eating a big piece of cake and comparing the levels between a diabetic reading versus all of our non-diabetic readings.

This is when I discovered that my then 3 year old had a reading of over 200 (almost double the normal). Because it wasn't a "fasting" blood sugar, I waited and re-tested her the next morning...still high. I made her a doctor's appointment that day...even higher. The PA there told me she was diabetic and wanted to refer us to a new Ped in the area. I took the appt...but wasn't totally comfortable with that doc.

I ended up driving her an hour up to the children's hospital. By the time we got there, and were seen...her blood sugar was back to normal, figures. They wanted to check her first thing in the AM again...with no food...and I already had the standing order from the other doc...so, instead of admitting her...we took her home, and back up for blood work the next day.

That blood test was fine...but her Insulin level was low Kinda makes no sense......if your insulin is low...your sugar goes up because it's the insulin that converts carbs to blood sugar and gets the sugar inside your cells for energy. I followed up with the doc...he says, it's not off that much...don't worry about it right now, it's not diabetes we'll keep an eye on it.

ok...so, a YEAR goes by.

I'm at the doctor last week with her for a UTI. This doc (our new one) notices her off reading for the insulin level last year and asked what was done about it. Huh? Nothing...that's what the doc said to do!

She decided that it needs to be followed up on now...we retest her the next morning after fasting again....the results....

Normal blood sugar, low Insulin...again! Now she has to consult with another Ped, and an Endocrinologist.....looks like more blood work in the future for my little one :(

Photo of a photo

2010-03-15T16:20:00.002-04:00

This is one of my favorite wall hangings that I have...Its a wire framed photo frame with 4 picture holders.
I have a pic of all 3 of my children in each Michigan Season :)
Spring - Grass background

Summer - Sand background
Fall - Leaf background
Winter - Snow background
...I TRY to change it each season

Halloween

2010-03-15T16:18:00.002-04:00

Halloween with our little Devil!!

Tricking with mommy....

Treating with daddy...

My BIG devil...

...and by the end of the day...my sleepy Devil :)

Of course, I have one more out there running around somewhere..but, at 15, he's too cool to be with mom and dad :)

Christmas Tree Hunt

2010-03-15T16:08:00.004-04:00

This is where we started our annual Christmas tree hunt.

This is the starting point...you pick out which variety of tree you want (out of 10 types), then they take you on a hayride to the section of the farm that grows your specific tree. We picked a White Spruce this year.

Here are the kids all loaded up and awaiting the hayride....My 3 plus a girlfriend

Here we are with our find...before the cut.

And...here is our annual Christmas card pic...us with our tree :)

....nothing better than enjoying hot chocolate and candy canes while they drill, shake and wrap our tree.

Here it is PRE-decorations...

.....and POST-decorations!

Tis the season...Merry Christmas!!

Homemade Wine

2010-03-15T15:44:00.003-04:00

We did it...5 whole gallons of wine!! :)
Here is the process.....

Mixing the ingredients and trying to patiently wait for 5 weeks.

The siphoning into bottles...

The extra, of course, goes into a glass for now. :)

The corking....

That's hard work...wine break :)

The finished products....

Christmas for us......

....and for family.

Angel's Spoons....RIP

2010-03-15T15:38:00.001-04:00

The Spoon Theory

By Christine Miserandino

My best friend and I were in the diner, talking. As usual, it was very late and we were eating French fries with gravy. Like normal girls our age, we spent a lot of time in the diner while in college, and most of the time we spent talking about boys, music or trivial things that seemed very important at the time. We never got serious about anything in particular and spent most of our time laughing.

As I went to take some of my medicine with a snack as I usually did, she watched me with an awkward kind of stare, instead of continuing the conversation. She then asked me out of the blue what it felt like to have Lupus and be sick. I was shocked not only because she asked the random question, but also because I assumed she knew all there was to know about Lupus. She came to doctors with me, she saw me walk with a cane, and throw up in the bathroom. She had seen me cry in pain, what else was there to know?

I started to ramble on about pills, and aches and pains, but she kept pursuing, and didn’t seem satisfied with my answers. I was a little surprised because I thought being my roommate in college and friend for years that she already knew the medical definition of Lupus. Then she looked at me with a face every sick person knows well, the face of pure curiosity about something no one healthy can truly understand. She asked what it felt like, not physically, but what it felt like to be me, to be sick.

As I tried to gain my composure, I glanced around the table for help or guidance, or at least stall for time to think. I was trying to find the right words. How do I answer a question I never was able to answer for myself? How do I explain every detail of every day being affected, and describe the emotions a sick person goes through with clarity? I could have given up, cracked a joke like I usually do, and changed the subject, but I remember thinking if I don’t try to explain this, how could I ever expect her to understand? If I can’t explain this to my best friend, how could I explain my world to anyone else? I had to at least try.

At that moment, the spoon theory was born. I quickly grabbed every spoon on the table; hell, I grabbed spoons off of the other tables. I looked at her in the eyes and said, “Here you go, you have Lupus.” She looked at me slightly confused, as anyone would when they are being handed a bouquet of spoons. The cold metal spoons clanked in my hands, as I grouped them together and shoved them into her hands.

I explained that the difference in being sick and being healthy is having to make choices or to consciously think about things when the rest of the world doesn’t have to. The healthy have the luxury of a life without choices, a gift most people take for granted.

Most people start the day with unlimited amount of possibilities, and energy to do whatever they desire, especially young people. For the most part, they do not need to worry about the effects of their actions. So for my explanation, I used spoons to convey this point. I wanted something for her to actually hold, for me to then take away, since most people who get sick feel a “loss” of a life they once knew. If I was in control of taking away the spoons, then she would know what it feels like to have someone or something else, in this case Lupus, being in control.

She grabbed the spoons with excitement. She didn’t understand what I was doing, but she is always up for a good time, so I guess she thought I was cracking a joke of some kind like I usually do when talking about touchy topics. Little did she know how serious I would become?

I asked her to count her spoons. She asked why, and I explained that when you are healthy you expect to have a never-ending supply of “spoons.” But when you have to now plan your day, you need to know exactly how many “spoons” you are starting with. It doesn’t guarantee that you might not lose some along the way, but at least it helps to know where you are starting. She counted out 12 spoons. She laughed and said she wanted more. I said no, and I knew right away that this little game would work, when she looked disappointed, and we hadn’t even started yet. I’ve wanted more “spoons” for years and haven’t found a way yet to get more, why should she? I also told her to always be conscious of how many she had, and not to drop them because she can never forget she has Lupus.

I asked her to list off the tasks of her day, including the most simple. As she rattled off daily chores, or just fun things to do, I explained how each one would cost her a spoon. When she jumped right into getting ready for work as her first task of the morning, I cut her off and took away a spoon. I practically jumped down her throat. I said “ No! You don’t just get up. You have to crack open your eyes, and then realize you are late. You didn’t sleep well the night before. You have to crawl out of bed, and then you have to make yourself something to eat before you can do anything else, because if you don’t, you can’t take your medicine, and if you don’t take your medicine you might as well give up all your spoons for today and tomorrow too.” I quickly took away a spoon and she realized she hadn’t even gotten dressed yet. Showering cost her a spoon, just for washing her hair and shaving her legs. Reaching high and low that early in the morning could actually cost more than one spoon, but I figured I would give her a break; I didn’t want to scare her right away. Getting dressed was worth another spoon.

I stopped her and broke down every task to show her how every little detail needs to be thought about. You cannot simply just throw clothes on when you are sick. I explained that I have to see what clothes I can physically put on, and if my hands hurt that day, buttons are out of the question. If I have bruises that day, I need to wear long sleeves, and if I have a fever I need a sweater to stay warm and so on. If my hair is falling out, I need to spend more time to look presentable, and then you need to factor in another five minutes for feeling badly that it took you two hours to do all this.

I think she was starting to understand when she theoretically didn’t even get to work, and she was left with six spoons. I then explained to her that she needed to choose the rest of her day wisely, since when your “spoons” are gone, they are gone. Sometimes you can borrow against tomorrow’s “spoons,” but just think how hard tomorrow will be with less “spoons.” I also needed to explain that a person who is sick always lives with the looming thought that tomorrow may be the day that a cold comes, or an infection, or any number of things that could be very dangerous. So you do not want to run low on “spoons,” because you never know when you truly will need them. I didn’t want to depress her, but I needed to be realistic, and unfortunately being prepared for the worst is part of a real day for me.

We went through the rest of the day, and she slowly learned that skipping lunch would cost her a spoon, as well as standing on a train, or even typing at her computer too long. She was forced to make choices and think about things differently. Hypothetically, she had to choose not to run errands, so that she could eat dinner that night.

When we got to the end of her pretend day, she said she was hungry. I summarized that she had to eat dinner but she only had one spoon left. If she cooked, she wouldn’t have enough energy to clean the pots. If she went out for dinner, she might be too tired to drive home safely. Then I also explained, that I didn’t even bother to add into this game, that she was so nauseous, that cooking was probably out of the question anyway. So she decided to make soup, it was easy. I then said it is only 7 pm, you have the rest of the night but maybe end up with one spoon, so you can do something fun, or clean your apartment, or do chores, but you can’t do it all.

I rarely see her emotional, so when I saw her upset I knew maybe I was getting through to her. I didn’t want my friend to be upset, but at the same time I was happy to think finally maybe someone understood me a little bit. She had tears in her eyes and asked quietly, “Christine, how do you do it? Do you really do this everyday?” I explained that some days were worse than others; some days I have more spoons than most. But I can never make it go away and I can’t forget about it, I always have to think about it. I handed her a spoon I had been holding in reserve. I said simply, “I have learned to live life with an extra spoon in my pocket, in reserve. You need to always be prepared.”

It’s hard, the hardest thing I ever had to learn is to slow down, and not do everything. I fight this to this day. I hate feeling left out, having to choose to stay home, or to not get things done that I want to. I wanted her to feel that frustration. I wanted her to understand, that everything everyone else does comes so easy, but for me it is one hundred little jobs in one. I need to think about the weather, my temperature that day, and the whole day’s plans before I can attack any one given thing. When other people can simply do things, I have to attack it and make a plan like I am strategizing a war. It is in that lifestyle, the difference between being sick and healthy. It is the beautiful ability to not think and just do. I miss that freedom. I miss never having to count “spoons.”

After we were emotional and talked about this for a little while longer, I sensed she was sad. Maybe she finally understood. Maybe she realized that she never could truly and honestly say she understands. But at least now she might not complain so much when I can’t go out for dinner some nights, or when I never seem to make it to her house and she always has to drive to mine. I gave her a hug when we walked out of the diner. I had the one spoon in my hand and I said “Don’t worry. I see this as a blessing. I have been forced to think about everything I do. Do you know how many spoons people waste everyday? I don’t have room for wasted time, or wasted “spoons” and I chose to spend this time with you.”

Ever since this night, I have used the spoon theory to explain my life to many people. In fact, my family and friends refer to spoons all the time. It has been a code word for what I can and cannot do. Once people understand the spoon theory they seem to understand me better, but I also think they live their life a little differently too. I think it isn’t just good for understanding lupus, but anyone dealing with any disability or illness. Hopefully, they don’t take so much for granted or their life in general. I give a piece of myself, in every sense of the word when I do anything. It has become an inside joke. I have become famous for saying to people jokingly that they should feel special when I spend time with them, because they have one of my “spoons.”

Haunted Hospital

2010-03-15T14:56:00.002-04:00

ok...so the hyperlink thingy STILL doesn't work for me :/ so...here is the info link about the "Haunted Hospital" we visited while on vacation.

http://www.hauntedhouses.com/states/ky/maysville_hospital.cfm

A few of us chickened out (my cousin and my dtr) and wouldn't go in, and one of us wimped out during our tour (her son) and ran out crying...other than that...we were all frightened silly and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. We never saw or heard anything "other worldly", but it was SO dark and SO scary...that we will be thinking about this experience for a long time!!

We even want to go back again sometime...and go at night. "spooky!!"

We found the Morgue, and the area where they supposedly cremated the corpses.

You can see clearly in the pics, but only because of the flash... keep in mind...there were 8 of us and only ONE flashflight. Some areas...you couldnt see a foot in front of you.

Teenage troubles

2010-03-15T14:54:00.000-04:00

Oh what to do......As soon as I begin to think things are ok, they start to fall apart again.

Yesterday started fine...with the exception of my oldest not being home (very common lately.)

I've known for a while that I have to start pulling the strings a little tighter around this boy. He has too much freedom.

well...I think I might have waited to long to decide how to go about it.

He was at a friends birthday party last night and wanted to "stay out" I said no, because it was getting to be an all the time thing. He wanted to stay at a friends house after the party and I said no...come home at the end. I went from come home at 10:30 to ok, 11:30, to ok...12:30...but NO later.

at 12:35 I texted , no answer.

at 13:40 I called, straight to voicemail.

at 12:45 I got in the car and went looking.

Again, I called all his friends, went to the houses where I thought he might be, and put the word out that the police station was my last stop.

He called me, didnt tell me where he was, but refused to come home...even said, Why dont I just let him go live somewhere else.

After texting back and forth....I got an idea about where he was...but, not enough to find him.

At 1:40 pm, I got the Michigan State Police involved........we searched together and ended up finding him.

Where do I go from here...they said it was up to me whether or not to file juevinile charges. I just dont know...I dont want him thinking he can do this again, but I dont want a permanent record for him either.

I'm pissed that the fucking Army is so strick that my hubby, just 1 hour away couldnt come help without having to jump through hoops, that I just didnt feel like dealing with last night.

This morning I'm still pissed at both of them. After lying in bed for an hour after getting home 3:00 am, listening for a window or door opening where he might leave again.....I'm pooped and....

just dont know where to go from here.

Three years ago...

2010-03-15T14:53:00.001-04:00

....you were almost taken from us.

Three years ago, you shot that deer, and waited in anticipation to get down and find your kill.

One wrong move and your life was changed forever.

It's 6:35 pm as I write this. About the time you fell.

About the time you broke more bones in your body that you even thought about on a daily basis.

About the time your pain and tingling in your legs and chest faded away to nothing...forever.

I'm so sorry you had to lay there for so long...in pain, and agony, and fear.....so alone.

That is the part I can't get over, still.....3 years later even.

I just left your house, yours and mom's. I felt you in my arms and know that your okay.....still, the memory haunts me.

I remind you every year on the date of your anniversary ...your Happy "Crappy" Anniversary we jokingly call it. Yet, I can't tear the image of you...helpless, broken and alone.from my mind.

I hope that living it once was enough for you...that you don't have to re-live it in your nightmares....or your thoughts as they wander.

I love you dad....and am so thankful that you are still here with us.

I'm sorry the accident has left your body only a shell of what it once was.

I'm glad your heart and soul are still yours....and mine to share.

Fun in Kentucky

2009-04-08T13:37:00.004-04:00

We're back and we all had a blast!! It was a long drive, but well worth it.

My cousin and best friend moved there from Mi several years ago...and we do our best to try to see each other as much as possible still.

One of the highlights for the kids was visiting a "Haunted Hospital"...its a deserted hospital that is well known in the area for being haunted. I'll make another post soon with lots of details about it. Oh, and some of my pics from inside had orbs in them!! (which are supposedly ghosts)

We went on a 3 mile hike along an old buffalo/civil war trail.

We walked across a 1 mile bridge that connects Ohio and Kentucky....over the Ohio river.

We played at parks....lots of them.

We visited an OLD cemetery which holds old relatives of Daniel Boone, this was their hometown, and we brought them flowers.

We went rock climbing (the boys anyway) and collected limestone for my pond. :)

We picnicked and fished on the Ohio River.

We also had cookouts, went shopping, visited Coffee Shops and bookstores, visited the libraries and a local museum wall with historical paintings, played on the trampoline, went to the movies, visited new restaurants...we did it ALL...It was such a blast...the little ones cried when it was time for us to go. :(

My new love...

2009-03-26T10:53:00.002-04:00

...isn't she a beauty!!

Does anyone have the number for eBayers Anonymous?

Birthday Fun

2009-03-24T07:40:00.003-04:00

A visit to Build-A-Bear with 5 of your closest friends is JUST what you need to make a 5 year old feel like a Birthday Princess!!

She had SO much fun. :)

Relaxing in a hot tub...

2009-03-18T18:13:00.004-04:00

...with a 5 year old who just got new paints, is not SO relaxing.

View from the inside...

2009-03-17T13:19:00.002-04:00

Raine and I were having a talk yesterday about me being pregnant with her.
So she says to me that she remembers "being inside". Here's our conversation...LOL

I said "oh yeah, what was it like in there?"
Her reply..."Well...it was nice and cozy. I went up to your head too."
Me..."you did?"
Her..."Yep..there were lot's of stars in there. Oh...and down below...it's kinda nasty down there."

Hah!
Thanks Raine!

I want to give you a GIFT

2009-03-15T12:34:00.001-04:00

The first five people to respond to this post will get something made by me! My choice. For you. This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:

1. I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!
2. What I create will be just for you.
3. It'll be done this year. (ha! 10 whole months :)
4. You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. It may be poetry or an article on properly cleaning your face before a masque. I may draw or paint something. I may bake something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
5. I reserve the right to do something extremely strange.

The catch? Oh, the catch is that you must re-post this on your blog and offer the same to the first 5 people who do the same on your blog.The first 5 people to do so and leave a comment telling me they did win a FAB-U-LOUS homemade gift by me! I do promise fabulosity here friends...

Fun Food Pics

2009-03-14T08:34:00.010-04:00

These are a few of our fun food pics from the last 2 days....hello extra pounds! :/

...Banana Splits! Her daddy got money for his birthday, and bought all the fixings for these babies as a last hurrah for her being 4 years old. (that makes me sad) They were yummy!

These are ice-cream cone cupcakes that Raine and I made to take to her class for her birthday! ...Fun!!

This is a family sized pizza we ordered for Friday night...isn't it HUGE!

Star Light...

2009-03-04T16:35:00.003-05:00

Star Light
Star Bright
First star I see tonight,
I wish I may
I wish I might....
Get the wish I wish tonight.

Last night, Raine and I both made wishes on the first star we saw. This morning she says to me....

"Mom check your wallet, last night I wished on that star for a million dollars." :)

Weekend waterpark fun!

2009-03-01T09:35:00.006-05:00

We decided....spur of the moment to just getaway for the night.

....it was just what we needed.

Just LOOK at all the fun we had!

Should I , or shouldn't I ?!

2009-02-22T12:16:00.002-05:00

I need to write some thoughts and pro's and con's down to help me figure this out....feel free to help if you have any comments or suggestions.
This way I can mull it over...and add to the lists as more things come to mind.

I am a Registered Nurse, working as a school nurse. I work 5 hour days...5 days a week. 25 hours per week...which classifies me as part-time with no benefits. I'm on my 4th school year in this position. I love the job, and everyone I work with, students included.

Perks of the job

Part-time hours
5 hour shifts
positive work environment
same schedule as my kids
half-days, snow-days, holidays, nights and weekends off.
summers off
very flexible
no babysitter needed

Downfalls of the job

no benefits
no pay for 3 months out of the year
not much security due to school budgeting
not much clinical experience

ok...Instead of looking for a temporary 3 month position every summer, to supplement my income, I've been thinking about getting a full-time position at the local hospital. This would be in addition to the school position that I already have. I have missed the hospital, and would love to eventually get back into it, I'm just not positive yet if now is the right time.

Pro's
more than doubling my current income
clinical environment
work experience
job security
guaranteed employment if my school position is eliminated
benefits
3 day work week
paid training and certifications

Cons
12 hour shifts
nights, weekends, and holidays
babysitter will be needed at times (due to hubbies schedule)
61 hour work week including school position
not enough sleep
possible back to back shifts

Is it just me?

2009-02-21T16:53:00.002-05:00

Am I the only blogging slacker here?

My poor blog hasn't had any updates in so long. I guess that says good things about the websites that I DO visit regularly. Guess I like them :)

Ok...for anyone who's missed me...I promise to do better and keep you informed of the insane daily happenings through my blog :)

Painter's for hire

2009-01-09T17:51:00.002-05:00

We promise not to make a mess.....NOT

(He started it!)

Poor dead tree

2008-12-19T16:15:00.003-05:00

NEVER buy a real tree in November...just be patient and wait until December.

Poor little guy....here's our temporary replacement for this year.

What have I created?

2008-12-19T09:37:00.002-05:00

...this was heard our of my FOUR year old's mouth this morning.

"Mom, I've found the perfect pair of shoes!"

....yikes!

Gallbladder surgery...what fun!

2008-12-06T07:39:00.001-05:00

Urgh...surgery sucks. Well, honestly the surgery was nothing...just a lil nap that they woke me too soon from :/
It was the excruciating pain before hand, and the chills and nausea afterwards that kicked my ass.

It started Thursday morning, I awoke with a headache. I got up, got the boys ready for school and got on the computer. I just felt ick...couldn't really explain it. I decided to let Raine sleep in, and both of us would rest, and goto work/school late.

By the time she woke up, My back was starting to really bother me, it was across both of my shoulders. I though I sat in my computer chair too long :) We stay home a bit longer then Raine decides she wants to goto school, she would miss too much staying home. She and I get ready, and I drive her to school. I drop her off in the classroom and head back to the parking lot. THEN it starts.

It started off as heartburn, but by that time I knew it was my gallbladder. The pressure and pain grew so intense, I had to pull over in the parking lot before I even made it to the road. It ended up easing a bit, so I took off. Well...I though it was easing, what happened was, it started spazzaming, so the pain came and went, but was worse each time it came back I almost made it back to work, and I just knew I had to goto the hospital. I wondered if I should of just drove to work and then have them take me to the hospital, or just drive past the school and go straight to the ER. I ended up doing the latter, but in hindsight, I probably should have just called the ambulance.

I got there and got signed in, and of course had to wait for an ER bed to open up. During that time, I was pacing the hallway in tears...it was so bad!. Once the Dr. saw me, he ordered pain med right away, which worked instantly and actually worked for the rest of the night. The pain was GONE. Dilaudid is gooooood stuff!

After the blood work, urinalysis, and ultrasound we found out that my 1 little stone I had in July had multiplied GrEaTlY, and one actually got caught in the mouth of the gallbladder and caused the spazam, and subsequent infection. They tried to manually manipulate the stone in the US room, to free it, and it worked. By then...we had all agreed....if it didn't come out now, the same thing would happen again soon.

They admitted me overnight, so I could get IV antibiotics throughout the night, and surgery was scheduled for 9 the next AM. I felt fine all night...the stone was dislodged, the pain med was working, and the infection was subsiding. I was starving though :/ Of course, I didn't feel well that morning...so I didn't eat. Once I was a pre-op patient, I became NPO...nothing by mouth, not even water.

Surgery came and went without any problems. I went in at 9 and was back in my room about 11:30. I remember nothing except them waking me up and me still wanting to sleep. :) I went back to my room, and tried to sleep as much as I could, they gave me more dilaudid, which made me queezy this time....I finally had to ask hubby and the kids and family to leave for a bit...I just couldn't stay awake, and any sound irritated be for some reason.

They left, I slept for 3 hours, then the nurse woke me and told me it was time to go home. I was like...WHAT?! I haven't got up and walked, I haven't tried any liquids...we don't know how I 'm gonna handle this. (I'm a nurse dude, I know the procedures) So..he brought me a glass of apple juice....I drank half of it before I started getting sick with nausea. It was bad...chills and the whole nine yards.....so, I got more Zofran (keeps you from throwing up, supposedly) I ended up just going home...and trying my luck at going back to bed...it was a No Go. I puked the rest of the day and was so dehydrated throughout the night...I felt like my throat was bleeding.

It's 7:30 am...I'm gonna try it again. I've sipped on water throughout the night. I just poured myself my first cup of Joe, well see how it goes. I've taken my Zofran to try to keep the nausea at bay. I'm feeling a little sore...but can't take any Vicodin without anything in my stomach, or I'll be right back in the bathroom.

This is where I stand right now...pain and nausea, it's a vicious cycle...I'm going back to bed.

Michigan Fall

2008-11-16T11:35:00.004-05:00

Tis the season for good food, good friends and beautiful fall scenery.

Here's a shot of my back yard this year.

Parenting of Teens

2008-11-16T08:17:00.003-05:00

...I don't like it. Not even a little bit. Well ok, maybe a little...

.....sometimes that is.

It's haaard.

They don't listen.

It's a constant battle.

There's SO much drama.

I suddenly know nothing (or so they think).

Someone please tell me it's not just my teens!

I need wine for my whine.

I forgive you Santa

2008-11-13T07:09:00.002-05:00

Sitting in the hot tub last night (that's where Raine comes up with her good ones), we were talking about Christmas presents. I was asking her what she wanted and she mentioned what Santa might bring her.
I reminded her that last week when she was being naughty, I told her that Santa might not bring her anything unless she started being good again....

...Her reply....I forgive Santa.

After a couple of chuckles, I said...Raine, what do you think about that...do you think you should be good in case Santa is watching.....

...Her reply....I forgive you too. :/

Tough Memories

2008-11-11T09:31:00.001-05:00

Tough Memories

Over the weekend we had a joyous, yet sad anniversary date. Nov. 9th was the 2nd anniversary date of my dad's hunting accident.

As soon as November starts looming....it's almost all I can think of. It's weird, I can go most of the year (most, not all) just keeping it in the back of my mind, but when November hits...the thoughts all come back.

It's not that his injuries are overlooked during the year. They were so severe, we will never see past them again. He's paralyzed, and his whole life is forever changed, but he's ok. He will never get better than what he is right now...but, he's handling it.What is hard about remembering is seeing him, or imagining him at the time of his accident.

I feel the temperature of the November air, and think about him lying there for hours in the cold. I see the bare branches and think of him crashing down and hitting the ground. I see the fall leaves lying on the ground and think of him lying broken on the ground, barely clinging to life...alone. Alone in the dark, and the cold...and in pain and numbness. It just kills me everytime I remember the details of what he went through. I see his face...as white as death when I first saw him in ER after he was found...6 hours after the fall. I see my mom crumbling in the hall when she heard that his back and neck were broke. I feel the chill when I listen to the doctor say that the only hope we have is to save him from dying.

I have to MAKE my brain not think these thoughts, and focus on the present...I see him lying there in bed, smiling when we walk in and saying Hi babygirl. He didn't even remember the anniversary Sunday when I walked in with 2 bags of his favorite candy and a card. He didn't know what the occasion was...

...I wish sometimes, that I could forget too.

Hubbies video

2008-11-08T11:40:00.001-05:00

Hubby made a video clip while he was in Iraq....it's going in here for safe keeping. :)

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

New nursery rhyme?

2008-11-07T17:01:00.000-05:00

Raine's version of B-I-N-G-O

"L-A-N-G-O,
L-A-N-G-O,
L-A-N-G-OOOO and NEMO was his name-O

......hee-hee

Dad's Story

2008-11-07T17:00:00.001-05:00

Do you know how everyone dreads the middle of the night phone call?...Well, last November I got the middle of the night knock on the door. (horrible experience I might add) It was my cousin and his wife...these were his words..."Jen, get dressed and get to the hospital, it's your dad".

Here's the story......

Nov. 9th 5:00 pm.....my dad get's off work earlier than expected, and decides to make up on the hunting time that he had been missing out on.My mom is still not home, so he leaves her a note on the table..."Gone hunting". He heads out onto the family farm's 70 acres for 1 last hour of prime hunting time, to one of his many tree stands.

6:00 pm.....dad shoots a deer with his bow and arrow.

6:10pm....dad stands in his stand, and gets ready to climb down to track the deer. The tree stand is old, and the supporting board gives way, breaks and falls. My dad falls 15 feet, head first to the ground below. Along the way and during the fall, he breaks his neck, his back, his wrist, his sternum and several ribs. He also punctures a lung, and has a closed head brain injury. My dad lay alone, unconcious on the ground.

Sometime that evening....mom gets home from work, see's the hunting note, and settles in for the night. She has to be to work at 3:00 AM, and dozes off on the couch...waiting for dad to come back in.

11:00 pm...Mom wakes up and realizes the time and that dad is not back inside. She panics, and runs outside in the woods alone, yelling his name. After a while, of almost getting lost herself...she calls my aunt and cousins who live next door....by this time, another hour has passed.

12:00pm....My aunt convinces my mom to call 911, and help is on the way...the hunting party for the hunter has started.

1:00AM....7 hours after the fall....my dad is found...alone and broken, near death in the woods.

After 3 hospital transfers, 9 or more surgeries, 2 months on a ventilator, 4 months hospitilazation, and SOOO much more in between, we are almost a year after the accident. My dad is now paralyzed from the chest down, and his life will never be the same....but, he is here. He is a changed man, physically and emotionally, but...here.

Today my son hunted in my dad's tree....

We bought a new stand, and my husband SWORE to me that it was secure. He promised!!! I guess my dad's good luck and love of hunting passed on to his firstborn grandson. This is a pic of 2 of my favorite men...my son, and my dad.....Tyler got an 8pt buck on his second day of hunting.......The tradition lives on......

1/125th Inf Homecoming

2008-11-07T16:58:00.001-05:00

This is the link to the news clip of my hubbies homecoming. You have to click on PLAY VIDEO...enjoy :)

http://www.9and10news.com/category/story/?id=120802

ABC's Gone Wild

2008-11-07T16:54:00.001-05:00

Hubby is NOT allowed to help Raine...or anyone else for that matter, with their ABC's EVER again!!

I'm sitting here helping Raine with her Alphabet letters and sounds...

....here is a little taste of HIS version as he shouted them at us from the next room.

N -----Naughty, Nightie

T------ Thongs, Titties, Tequila

I totally tuned him out after that...Weirdo!

Bunny Ramblings

2008-11-07T16:52:00.000-05:00

Some of the funny things I need to remember :)

Her name is Marshmallow, but I'm gonna call her Marshmallow Sniffy, cuz I like it like that.

Aww, come here bunny, you look sad.

I love you bunny, I'll never kill you.

I'm her momma, but Nick is NOT her daddy!

Her reply when I told her she's being nice to her bunny...I know, and I don't even slap her!

My bunny thinks I smell good.

Look mom, she can hop like a bunny!

To Nick...My bunny is better than your dog.

Was it bad...

2008-11-07T16:51:00.000-05:00

....for me to start cracking up laughing when I got a call from my son's middle school to go and pick up my oldest son.

He was suspended for 2 days for being involved in a food fight. This is their last week in the MS building...and then they will be highschoolers.

Sorry...it was just funny to me (of course it probably wouldn't be if I was working in the cafeteria today)

Memorial Day Thanks

2008-11-07T16:50:00.001-05:00

I have trouble finding the right words...

I have trouble finding the right picture.....

I have NO trouble finding the thoughts that come to my mind, and the tears that come to my eyes, when I think of the TRUE meaning of Memorial Day.

It is with such great admiration that I give my whole hearted thanks to all who have given that ultimate sacrifice.

It is with such immense pain that I feel for those left behind, hurting.

From the bottom of my heart, thanks for being strong enough to do what needs to be done...for all of us.

Painfully honest

2008-11-07T16:42:00.001-05:00

You know it's time...

...to get a new bra, when your 4year old see's you in yours and says...

...mommy, that doesn't FIT you anymore...urghh

...shopping anyone?!

Do men listen?

2008-11-07T16:40:00.000-05:00

LOL...This is just too funny not to repeat.

We (me, Raine and hubby) were sitting in the hot tub this morning. It was nice and relaxing...so much so that Raine didn't want to get out. She started her game of delaying us by playing the "Magic word" game. She put her legs up as a bridge...and wouldn't let us out until we came up with the magic word. Here is part of our conversation....

Raine: You have to say the magic word mommy
Me: I've tried all the magic words that I know...I need some help...
Raine: ok. it's...Pretty please with ice-cream with chocolate sprinkles, chocolate syrup, whip cream and a cherry on top.
Mom: ok, Pretty please with ice-cream with chocolate sprinkles, chocolate syrup, whip cream and a cherry on top.
Raine: Good..your turn daddy
Dad: uummmm....sprinklies, chocolate swirls, and dolphins?

Now..there is your PROOF that men never listen!!

My 3 Gems

2008-11-07T16:39:00.000-05:00

This morning I have 3 things that I am greatful for....

1.) Tyler

He and I are both feeling back to normal, and are rebuilding our relationship.

2.) Nick

As difficult as he can be at times...he never fails to shower me with love.

3.) Raine

She has learned the value of telling the truth, and almost brought me to tears this morning when she proved that to me.

Teenage appetite

2008-11-07T16:37:00.000-05:00

Well no wonder...

...you don't feel good!!

I received a call from the MS to pick Tyler up, he's not feeling well and has an upset stomach.

So..I get there and casually ask, well...what did you eat bud? Here's his reply....

2 pancakes

2 sausage and egg bagel sandwiches

6 pieces of bacon

3 sausages

and 6 or 7 juices

....ummmm, well, YEAH!! I'd not feel well either!

Pep talk for a Military Wife

2008-11-07T16:33:00.001-05:00

...This was an actual conversation I had with hubby tonight....(I was feeling blue)

B: Hello sweety
J: Hey
B: What r u doing?
J: I'm not doing anything
B: R u feeling ok today?
J: I've been kinda weird all week...
J: I'm tired of being alone and doing it myself
B: I know ,it will be over soon
J: Not really
B: We're in the military sweety
J: I know babe
J: It just sucks sometimes is all, at times like this.
B: I know it does
B: It will get better I promise
J: I know
B: We do what other people wish they could do
J: How's that?
B: We help the United States prevail over terrorists.
J: I don't
B: Yes u do ,without you I wouldn't be in the military. I couldn't do it unless I had you.
J: aww
B: You r my right hand in this, and you help me get through the hard times more than u know.
J: Are you reading this out of a book? lol
B: No silly
B: For real, you allow me to have a family AND still fight for our country, other people are not strong enough for that.
J: I know
B: Do you work tomorrow?
J: Yeah, you?
B:No
J: aww, you suck!
B: No, you suck
B: ok well I'll call u in a little bit sweety
J: Alright babe...byee
B: I love u
B: Byee
J: I love you too
J: Bye

.....Corny, huh? :)

Michael

2008-11-07T16:31:00.001-05:00

As you all know...my hubby was deployed to Iraq for 15 months...not too awful long ago. During the time that he was there, he and the other soldiers in his "squad" became very close...even life-long friends. Not only them...but, their wives are now my soul-sisters...we have actually made it through hell together!

The media sometimes portrays our soldiers in a harsh light, and many of you know that that is one of my pet peeves...and one of the hardest parts of being a soldiers wife. I support him to no end.

There are SO many different sides to this war. It is definitely NOT just 2 sided, as in us and them. We (military) really are trying to do our best for this country(Iraq) who has no support of their own.

OK...enough of the emotional rant that I can get on so easily.....onto my news!

During the time that my hubby was there serving, he became VERY close with his Iraqi Interpreter....we call him Michael (unsure of his Iraqi name). Actually...the whole squad did. They (the intrepreters) were in just as much danger every day, right alongside our guys...helping their country in any way they could....even under great fear of retaliation to them and their families for working with the Americans. Michael's biggest dream was to be able to come to America and start over, here with his family, and be safe.

I just got word today that Michael was finally approved for a Visa and will be arriving in the States this week. He will be staying with the different families in our squad until he can get established. I can't WAIT to tell my hubby the good news...and I am really hoping that he will be able to stay with us for a time.

I am talking to a wife of one of the guys as I type this journal....and we are planning our next get together...to include Michael.

It's really not everyday that you hear about our guys opening their homes to "strangers" from a land that we are currently at war with...it really touches my heart, and I wanted to share it with you. :)

My Daughter's Prayer

2008-11-07T16:29:00.001-05:00

Dear God ~

Thank you for my daddy.

In Jesus name Amen.

(This was at breakfast this morning...have you ever heard anything sweeter?! ) :)

My moment at work

2008-11-07T16:24:00.000-05:00

My moment didn't happen during "Me" time...but, during work. Then again....My work is a big part of who I am...so, maybe it did.

Today one of my students (8 yrs old) came into my office during his lunchtime for his routine Insulin shot. He is newly Diabetic, and sometimes has trouble accepting all that he has to go through with the disease. Today was different.....

I walk in the office, and he lifts up his shirt, throws him arm at me, and says "Shoot Me" ....LOL. I giggled for about 10 minutes after he left!

....I love my job :)

Warning...

2008-11-07T08:08:00.002-05:00

...Just a warning here.

I'm about fed up with BBC and SeRiOuSlY considering leaving soon. I will invite everyone who wishes to follow me to my blog. I promise to start keeping up with posting here. :)

Sorry for anyone who has been bummed out by my not posting lately. :/

Birthday Story

2008-09-01T11:51:00.004-04:00

My first choice of things to do on my birthday was of course, to visit my favorite winery.

It was great...we tasted all their new wines since our last visit, bought a new bottle of our favorite red (along with 2 GORGEOUS new glasses), and had a glass there while enjoying the view.

We had such a great time, that I forgot about it being a Sunday evening on a Holiday weekend...so by the time I went to visit the Chocolate Shop for brownies, and the Nail shop for my pedicure...they were both closed :(

I did go home and do my own pedi though...not as nice, but it got the job done :)

We also went out for dinner with my son and his girlfriend...pretty fun actually....that was a first for us...double dating with our kids, lol We had pizza and pasta...then went and watched the new scary movie The Happening...it was FrEaKy!!

It was a Wonderful day! I was spoiled all the way around...I even asked hubby if it could be my birthday for ONE more day.......he said no :(

Hubby has done it again!

2008-08-09T10:46:00.002-04:00

Thanks hubby, for indulging my obsession, yet again!

Here is my Birthday present to be.....Thanks to eBay.

(if no one outbids us that is)

Fish Pedicures

2008-08-06T21:18:00.001-04:00

ok....so maybe you've heard of the new extravagent type of pedicures in the spas lately.....Fish Pedicures

I'm sure this is NOT what they mean, but....

....it's the first thing I thought of when Raine and I stuck our toes in for a dip, and we we're suddenly being nibbled on by tons of little fish!!!

New tattoo

2008-08-03T18:03:00.003-04:00

I finally got the one I've been waiting on for quite a while......

it's the Kanji symbol for Serenity

I love it.

Manic Monday

2008-07-28T08:57:00.002-04:00

Well...I seriously doubt that I will get all this done...but here it goes...my list for Manic Monday :)

Get a shower and get off my booty...after coffee of course
Get a hair appt for THIS am
Get hair color fixed (and quit trying to do it myself) :(
Take Raine to daycare
Get to work
Physicals for 170 children...yikes
Fill 15 first aid kits
Count and distribute meds
Try to make it out of work before Raines dance class
if not....Get my mom to take her to dance class
Decide on whether or not to cancel my gallbladder surgery :/
Home, dinner, laundry, baths and whatever else might (and usually does) come up.

....Gosh I'm tired already, and I'm still only just sitting here!

First time jitters

2008-07-06T23:25:00.002-04:00

I'm like a young girl.....unable to say no to peer pressure. Yes, I admit I am a blogging virgin. This is my first attempt and you are all here to witness it with me. I hope I can handle the responsibilities of it, and it will live up to my expectations :)