Tough Memories
Over the weekend we had a joyous, yet sad anniversary date. Nov. 9th was the 2nd anniversary date of my dad's hunting accident.
As soon as November starts looming....it's almost all I can think of. It's weird, I can go most of the year (most, not all) just keeping it in the back of my mind, but when November hits...the thoughts all come back.
It's not that his injuries are overlooked during the year. They were so severe, we will never see past them again. He's paralyzed, and his whole life is forever changed, but he's ok. He will never get better than what he is right now...but, he's handling it.What is hard about remembering is seeing him, or imagining him at the time of his accident.
I feel the temperature of the November air, and think about him lying there for hours in the cold. I see the bare branches and think of him crashing down and hitting the ground. I see the fall leaves lying on the ground and think of him lying broken on the ground, barely clinging to life...alone. Alone in the dark, and the cold...and in pain and numbness. It just kills me everytime I remember the details of what he went through. I see his face...as white as death when I first saw him in ER after he was found...6 hours after the fall. I see my mom crumbling in the hall when she heard that his back and neck were broke. I feel the chill when I listen to the doctor say that the only hope we have is to save him from dying.
I have to MAKE my brain not think these thoughts, and focus on the present...I see him lying there in bed, smiling when we walk in and saying Hi babygirl. He didn't even remember the anniversary Sunday when I walked in with 2 bags of his favorite candy and a card. He didn't know what the occasion was...
...I wish sometimes, that I could forget too.
Dear Betsy
8 years ago
7 comments:
I was just thinking about this, Jenn, because I remember you writing about it last year around this time.
It must be so very hard for you and your family. Your father is made out of very tough stuff.
I agree with Alicia... I remember when you told this to us on MM. It is such an incredibly sad story.
He must have an amazing spirit and be so thankful.
Hello honey! Yes I think about it too, I remember seeing him in the hospital and the various up and downs when he was in the hospital and just thank God that he is here with us today. But he is a Thomas so we all knew he was tough and wasn't going anywhere! I LOVE YOU!!!
Thank God he's still with you. Such an even is so hard to erase from our memory. Focus on the positive as hard as that may be.
Hang in there, you know I am always there for you. You can call me anytime and I will be by your side. I love you and I know how hard this is on you.
Oh Jenn, these memories must be so difficult for you! Seeing him as strong as he is, though, and having him not let it get him down must be awesome for you to witness. He sounds like an incredibly strong man, your Dad.
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